Under Pressure

Is it just me, or is the New Year always one of the most crazy, hectic, pressure-filled times of the year? Lately, at least since the New Year began, I feel like its one thing after another just piling up, trying to make me go officially insane. Or maybe that's just the way things happen...that whole bad things come in threes again, only its not necessarily bad, its just a million things to think about. And what's worse, when the stress gets to a certain level, I think we subconciously cling to the things that do make us smile and forget about the trillion other things we know we've got to think about. New home negotiations, law school applications, job possibilities, and meeting a whole bunch of new people that I need to make a good impression on...these are just a few of my trillion things that I've been focusing on in just the first week of this new year. And the things that I cling to when I'm frazzled, well I know that sometimes those things don't work. It is something I struggle with, I think...I expect too much of myself and those around me, hoping that someone will either help me do what needs getting done, or just make me feel better. And when friends can't be there for me, either because they're dealing with their own issues or simply can't be around to help, I think I try to make up for that by putting on a happy face. I've never wanted to be a burden to anyone else and so I simply don't say anything. And then of course, as we all know, it builds and builds until I realize that I just have to let the balls I'm juggling hit the floor. I think I'm going to have to keep reminding myself in the next couple of weeks, at least until everything calms down, that I can't keep sweating the small stuff. Ok, so maybe a lot of these things are big things, but I can't control the universe. As much as I might want to and try to a vast majority of the time, I just can't, and I think I'm going to have to remind the people around me that sometimes, I just need a good swift kick to the ass, and then a really great hug to make me feel better.