The stuff of legends....

So, as much as I hate to admit what a big baby I am, I will proudly say that I teared up yesterday upon hearing of the tragic death of Michael Jackson. Let's face it people, the man was a musical genius and anyone who disputes that is just naive. He was also a freak, which actually shouldn't surprise anyone who actually takes note of the geniuses of our culture. Prince, a prime example, Picasso, John Lennon (who was said to actually be a really huge ass), Madonna, Einstein, etc.....the list could go on. Eccentricity sets these people apart from society, but I feel like as far as MJ goes, he caught it more so than most. Maybe it is because he had no semblance of a childhood to speak of that he lived the way he did. In my opinion, he more than likely flocked to children for several reasons, the first being that they didn't judge him like those of us who were old enough to recognize his oddities, and second because he could genuinely make them smile and know that they had no ulterior motives. The man more than likely spent 75% of his time trying to figure out who was trying to use him for fame, fortune, or both. I can't imagine what that level of infamy could do to one's nerves, especially when you never knew anything different. The boy was 6 and changing the face of music forever. None of us will ever know that glory or that hardship, the weight that was put on his shoulders, and one he took on because he genuinely LOVED music and his fans. I know that my childhood was shaped by him, and let's face it, I'm in the younger generation. I can't think back to my time as a competitive dancer without thinking of one of my classmates doing a routine to Billie Jean. I remember thinking, "I want to dance like THAT." That's what he did; his dancing and his music inspired generations. I have every confidence that even beyond the grave, Michael Jackson will continue to inspire young artists.

Now, for my five second rant. I would never presume to tell someone that they HAVE to be a fan. Michael's life was plagued by enough controversy to sour anyone, and I know that. But somewhere along the line in this 24 hr news cycle world in which we live in, where we're encouraged to speak our minds constantly, we seem to have forgotten all manner of tact and decorum. A family lost a son, a father, a brother, an uncle, and a friend. For those people who have nothing nice to say, I want to suggest that they say nothing at all. It is infuriating to see such negativity spewed forth from judgmental people who never knew the man, and assume facts that were never in evidence. I hope for all parties that were close to him that they will avoid the media at all costs, simply so that they can find some peace in this tragic loss that came far too soon. To Michael; may you finally find a peace that you never had in your lifetime. You were one of a kind. Moonwalk it up there :)

Roma, Florence, and Cinque Terra....I wanna go back!!!

Ok, so it really has been a long time since I last posted, and yes Amber, I know I'm slack. But the mood is striking me today, so I'm writing!

Since I last posted, I took a 12 day trip to Italy. The trip of a lifetime, truly. If you have never been, my advice is to go, sooner rather than later. It is so beautiful that words really can't do it justice, especially my favorite area of Cinque Terra, or '5 Lands'. On the coast, these 5 villages sit precariously on the edges of cliffs with tiny buildings smooshed together to protect from the weather. You've never seen anything more mesmorizing, perplexing, and gorgeous all at the same time, I promise. But because you're destined to do a lot of walking around Rome, Florence, and areas like Cinque Terra, I say go when you can, as early as you can, and as often as you can!

The one downfall about the trip, that was also an incredible plus (not to seem ungrateful) was that I was there with my parents. As much fun as we have together, I feel like I need a vacation from them. Sharing everything for 12 straight days, including small spaces like the airplane, will make even the smallest things get on your nerves more than likely. And when the cute Italian waiter hits on you in front of your father, it kinda puts a damper on the mood!

Now that the trip is over, I'm back at my cubicle at work, counting down the remaining 29 days until I'm no longer here. I'll be sad because I truly will miss the girls that I work with, but definitely ready for the next adventure to start: law school! Taking a break before the chaos begins seems like the smartest idea I've had in a long time...and I'm determined to make the most of it! Let the days by the pool begin :)

My distracted life

Ok, so I know I've been gone for a while...ok, months. But when life comes at you full force, sometimes, all you can do is roll with it.

Brief update:
1. Got into law school finally! Talk about your waiting game. What a relief it was to finally hold that letter in my hands, knowing that all the excitment will quickly end as soon as I get my first syllabus. Damn.
2. Moved into my new house! One ongoing project after another. And I've learned not to argue with my dad when he gets an idea in his head. It's going to happen whether I like it or not usually, and once its ended, I've pretty much decided that he's been right. Again, damn.
3. Still haven't quit my job in the terrible, tan-cube existence. Its a constant cycle of ups and downs...some days I'm swamped and some days I can read news all day. Oh well, it is paying the bills on this new house, so I guess that is something considering the hard times we're all in these days.

So while I'm planning on getting back into blogging, not that anyone really reads this other than my good friends (love!!), I wish I could promise that they won't be spastic and strangely timed. I'll write more than likely when the mood strikes me...maybe to vent, or share about this crazy world I find myself suddenly in. Hopefully it will be more of the sharing than the venting.... :)

Under Pressure

Is it just me, or is the New Year always one of the most crazy, hectic, pressure-filled times of the year? Lately, at least since the New Year began, I feel like its one thing after another just piling up, trying to make me go officially insane. Or maybe that's just the way things happen...that whole bad things come in threes again, only its not necessarily bad, its just a million things to think about. And what's worse, when the stress gets to a certain level, I think we subconciously cling to the things that do make us smile and forget about the trillion other things we know we've got to think about. New home negotiations, law school applications, job possibilities, and meeting a whole bunch of new people that I need to make a good impression on...these are just a few of my trillion things that I've been focusing on in just the first week of this new year. And the things that I cling to when I'm frazzled, well I know that sometimes those things don't work. It is something I struggle with, I think...I expect too much of myself and those around me, hoping that someone will either help me do what needs getting done, or just make me feel better. And when friends can't be there for me, either because they're dealing with their own issues or simply can't be around to help, I think I try to make up for that by putting on a happy face. I've never wanted to be a burden to anyone else and so I simply don't say anything. And then of course, as we all know, it builds and builds until I realize that I just have to let the balls I'm juggling hit the floor. I think I'm going to have to keep reminding myself in the next couple of weeks, at least until everything calms down, that I can't keep sweating the small stuff. Ok, so maybe a lot of these things are big things, but I can't control the universe. As much as I might want to and try to a vast majority of the time, I just can't, and I think I'm going to have to remind the people around me that sometimes, I just need a good swift kick to the ass, and then a really great hug to make me feel better.

Bye Christmas...Hello New Year!

Christmas....the most wonderful and exhausting time of the year. I had a great Christmas...family, friends, good food, good times. But damn, I'm glad its over. I need a vacation from my vacation! Even though I had some time off from work, I feel like all I did was entertain people or visit, running here and there, which is what has probably caused my sinus troubles. Well that, and this ridiculous weather that we have. It doesn't seem like Mother Nature wants to decide which way to go at this point: summer or winter, make up your mind! As I say goodbye to the holidays, I do think I should look back on this year and be grateful. No, I don't have a house yet, or a dog, or a permanent job, and no, I haven't actually been accepted into law school yet, but all those things are coming. I can just tell. I know when I walk into my house, I will know it is mine, not like the house I went into yesterday. I can't tell you how disappointing it is to get your hopes up and walk into the 7th circle of hell on earth. How people can live like that is beyond me; bad wallpaper, nasty carpeting, an odor of some sort (Amber compared it to old people and bad breath), and stuff that accumulates over a lifetime spread out EVERYWHERE. That was NOT my house. My house is coming soon, and so is everything else. I just need to learn to have patience...which most of my friends would tell you is a character trait I tend to lack most of the time. Maybe that will be my New Year's resolution: be more patient with myself and everyone around me. Yeh...haha, good luck to me.

On a final note, to everyone who has lost someone this past year, my prayers are with you. I could not be prouder of my grandmother for being strong in this first Christmas without her husband of more than 60 years. It could not have been easy. We miss you Grandpa. Love you always.

Problems in Threes

Ok, so we've all heard the saying, "Bad things happen in threes." Well, I'm here to tell everyone, my family is proving that wrong this week. My parents have a Christmas party every year; 150 of our nearest and dearest friends, not even including MY friends. I thought this year was going to be amazing. We have a beautiful tree, some of my best friends are coming in from out of town, and to top it all off, my dad's twin brother is coming into town to surprise him! Well, that was before the storm. First, our tree fell over. Not like a crashing to the ground kind of thing; more like a leaning on the nearest wall. Broke at least a few ornaments and we had to almost redo the whole thing. Then, my dad caught a vicious cold, which has still got him feeling crappy. Then, our oven decided that it just didn't want to work anymore, which considering we cook for these 150 people and need the oven, is a very very bad thing. THEN, today, my dad calls me at work and tells me that while blowing leaves out of the yard to make it look pretty, his leaf blower explodes. I mean, are we serious? This is almost at a ridiculous level, and I swear that if things continue the way they are, my mom is going to go insane. Thankfully, I think we've gotten it all under control, and dear god, I pray nothing else goes wrong. Now, I'm just looking forward to picking my uncle up from the airport and having my friends arrive. And when we put that new oven in, it better make some damn good food.

Surprises

I have officially decided that the best things in life happen completely by surprise. I know that some people don't like surprises, and I just don't get it! Maybe its a fear of being badly surprised, like thrown off by something that isn't good, or you didn't want. But think about it. Most things that have surprised me in my life have turned out to be great! Surprisingly enough, I went to a college that I swore I would never apply to and met some of the best friends in the world. My 18th birthday party was a total surprise, and even though everyone scared me half to death, all my favorite people were there with me to celebrate. There's the puppy you get as a kid for Christmas that's a surprise (oh wait, that would be what I'm hoping for this year). And what about surprise proposals? 99% of the time, I bet those work out perfectly (not that I would know for sure, haha). And what about those surprise people you meet? A great guy for example, who turns out to be nothing like all the jerks you've dated before, or a new best friend that you meet at work or through another friend or wherever. I'll say one thing, this warm weather that is happening today was definitely a surprise and speaking as a warm weather kind of girl, I'm going to enjoy it. My free advice to everyone, if something surprises you, take a moment to enjoy the fact that you didn't even see it coming. To me, that's the best part.